IF DOGS RACED BIKES PROFESSIONALLY

THIS WOULD BE THEIR TEAM

For every role in professional cycling there's the perfect breed: the skinny climber,

the long-legged rouleur, the one day classics dynamo, the power-packed sprinter. 

 

Thanks to centuries of selective breeding, Hundini Fiasco have been able to choose the perfect dog breed for every role in their ProTour cycling team. 

 

Introducing Hundini Fiasco Pro Cycling. 

The Quickstep of pretend dog cycling teams. 

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ONE DAY RACER

Fearless, intelligent and affectionate, with a ground covering gallop and incredible stamina, he rarely tires. Beautifully balanced, well muscled and keen to work in all weathers.

 

General classification

Lithe, aerodynamic with heavily muscled strong legs, large chest and enormous lungs. A thoroughbred, made and bred for racing. His long stride and and elegant gait are the signs of peerless athletic ability.

 

KING OF THE ROULEURS

Powerful swift and keen sighted. Movements active and smooth, long thighed and muscular, capable of impressive feats of great endurance with a loping yet efficient stride carrying him on and on.

 

Sprinter

With powerful, thickly muscled hindquarters he’s incredibly strong. A well shaped chest protects good sized lungs. Ears fairly tight to the head. He possesses an efficient trot with reasonable endurance and an extraordinary burst of strength when required.

 

DOMESTIQUE

Strong sturdy and reliable, with good energy levels and a positive attitude. Strong backed and happy to work long hours but equally happy at home resting and sleeping. 

 

PUNCHEUR

Perfectly balanced combination of muscular power and strength with elegance and grace of outline. Built for speed, his legs give great propelling power. His lean body is perfectly adapted for exceptional physical feats. 

 

CLIMBER

Tiny, swift, efficient and lightweight. Well balanced, dainty in gait and movement with a rounded apple head. Determined, stubborn and confident with vast amounts of energy despite his tiny frame.

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MOUNTAIN DOMESTIQUE

Symmetrical and compact, legs neither too long nor too short, Pug has a massive head and is square with strong legs with distinct hardness of muscle. A light body allows him to move with reasonable speed although he does suffer some breathing difficulties.

 

NEo PRO

Pint-pot sized with all the complexities and physical potential of his larger cousins. Agile, incredibly fast and lightweight, but a little fragile.His light body with long, fine boned legs requires extra care in inclement weather.

 

FUTILE BREAKAWAY ENTHUSIAST

Compact, intelligent, small chested but with a big heart, tough, determined and fearless with an insatiable appetite for adventure.

Can get himself into mischief if bored. A little dynamo of boundless cheeky energy.

 

SPRINT LEADOUT

Well balanced and with great strength for his size. Muscular, active and agile with economy of effort. Bold, fearless and incredibly loyal, he is completely reliable. With his big head and pronounced cheek muscles he’s intimidating, but behind that cold stare is an affectionate character. 

 

CYCLOCROSS

Has great drive and he covers ground well. Happy in water, mud and deep undergrowth he enjoys being off the beaten track. Will work happily in inclement weather and has great energy levels.   

 

THE OLD PRO

Compact, built with a well knit short body. A look of determination, strength and activity. Limbs strong, although originally bred to fight, he’s occasionally wheezy due to his flat face and quite stubborn. A picture of fortitude.

 

BUS DRIVER

Alert, bold and dependable. Thickset and low in stature with loose skin and stout muscular legs. Not the most athletic, his intimidating looks hide an affectionate personality. 

 

Broom Wagon DRIVER

A ghastly mixed bag. The unfortunate result of a midnight stray dog orgy. Visually troubling yet blessed with a fresh influx of diverse genetic material which make him surprisingly healthy and athletic.